A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she lay her pet on the table, The veterinary surgeon pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two, The veterinary surgeon shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your Duck Cuddles has passed away."
The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?
"Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied.
"How can you be so sure," she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The veterinary surgeon rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, and returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever.
As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom.
He then looked at The veterinary surgeon with sad eyes and shook his head.
The veterinary surgeon patted the dog and took it out, and returned a few moments later with a cat.
The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on it's haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The veterinary surgeon looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
Then veterinary surgeon turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.