* Motorcycles only need their fluids changed every 2000 miles.
* Motorcycles' curves never sag.
* Motorcycles last longer.
* Motorcycles don't get pregnant.
* You can ride a Motorcycles any time of the month.
* Motorcycles don't have parents.
* Motorcycles don't whine unless something is really wrong.
* You can kick your Motorcycle to wake it up.
* You can share your Motorcycle with your friends.
* If your Motorcycle makes too much noise, you can buy a muffler.
* You only need to get a new chain or belt for your Motorcycle when the old one is really worn.
* If your Motorcycle smokes, you can do something about it.
* Motorcycles don't care about how many other Motorcycles you have ridden.
* When riding, you and your Motorcycle both arrive at the same time.
* Motorcycles don't care about how many other Motorcycles you have.
* Motorcycles don't mind if you look at other Motorcycles, or if you buy Motorcycle magazines.
* New Motorcycles must be asked for, and if you don't want to pay for them, you don't get them.
* If your Motorcycle goes flat, you can fix it.
* If your Motorcycle is too loose, you can tighten it.
* If your Motorcycle is too soft, you can get different shocks.
* If your Motorcycle is misaligned, you don't have to discuss politics to correct it.
* You can have a beer while riding your Motorcycle.
* You don't have to be jealous of the guy that works on your Motorcycle.
* You don't have to deal with priests or blood-tests to register your Motorcycle.
* You don't have to convince your Motorcycle that you're a motorcyclist and that you think that Motorcycles are equals.
* If you say bad things to your Motorcycles, you don't have to apologize before you can ride it again.
* You can ride a Motorcycle as long as you want and it won't get sore.
* Your parents don't remain in touch with your old Motorcycle after you dump it.
* Motorcycles always feel like going for a ride.
* Motorcycles don't insult you if you are a bad rider.
* Your Motorcycle never wants a night out alone with the other Motorcycles.
* Motorcycles don't care if you are late.
* You don't have to take a shower before riding your Motorcycle.
* It's always ok to use tie downs on your Motorcycle.
* If your Motorcycle doesn't look good, you can paint it or get better parts.
* You can't get diseases from a Motorcycle you don't know very well.